In today’s digital age, the widespread use of social media has impacted many aspects of our lives and become an integral part of our daily routines, offering platforms for sharing personal updates, photos, and opinions, connecting with friends and family, and providing endless opportunities for communication and expression. While social media can be a valuable tool, the new issues that arise with it and its impact on child custody cases cannot be underestimated. Social media presence and activity can provide insight into a parent's life, behavior, and parenting style. A few poorly-thought-out posts, comments, or photos can make the difference between a parent being primary or having a standard possession order.
When determining conservatorship and possession schedules, courts look at what is in the best interest of the child. Social media activity provides evidence that may be used to support or refute claims regarding a parent’s activities, relationships, habits, behavior, or lifestyle, and judges use this evidence to assess parents’ fitness. Judges like to see consistency between the way parents present themselves in court and in their online personas. Therefore, when determining whether to post something on social media, especially during a custody battle, extra caution should be used, especially because social media posts can be very easy to take out of context. There are several types of posts that can be particularly alarming to coparents and to the court.
Posts Indicating Substance Use or Abuse
Posting about drinking or drug use can be particularly dangerous, especially if they tend to show consumption to excess or that consumption is a regular occurrence. These posts can make parents look irresponsible and unstable, so it’s important to drink responsibly, avoid drugs, and avoid posting about partying on social media.
Posts Indicating Violent Behavior or Tendencies
Posts showing involvement in criminal activities or that a parent has unsecured firearms in the house can be used against parents, especially when paired with any sort of threatening language, no matter how vague. It does not matter whether such posts are directed at the other parent, the court, or the public at large; courts normally find them to be cause for concern, as they can make parents look irresponsible, unstable, and unable—or worse, unwilling—to provide a safe environment for a child.
Posting About Court Proceedings and Co-parenting
Negative posts about court proceedings, your ex-spouse, or your child can be used against you during a child custody case. They can show an unwillingness to communicate and co-parent effectively, and a willingness to defy court orders, especially if the court has told the parties not to speak about the case or disparage the other parent with the child. If a parent is willing to talk about it online, often to total strangers, who is to say that they wouldn’t speak about it with the child?
Posting About Financial Matters
Income can be a significant factor in child custody cases, especially in determining how much child support needs to be paid. Posting about lavish vacations, expensive purchases, or new vehicles may make the court think that you have more income than you actually do, and you also run the risk of looking irresponsible with money.
Tips for Navigating Social Media During Child Custody Proceedings
- Exercise Discretion: Think twice before sharing personal information or photos on social media, especially if it pertains to your parenting or lifestyle choices. During proceedings, it may be best to simply take a hiatus from social media altogether.
- Adjust Privacy Settings: Take advantage of privacy settings on social media platforms to control who can see your posts and profile information. Limiting access to your social media content can help protect your privacy.
- Avoid Negative Comments: Parents often tell their children that if they can’t say something nice, they shouldn’t say anything at all. These are still wise words to live by when considering whether to post during court proceedings. If you choose to do so, refrain from making negative or disparaging comments about the proceedings or about the other parent.
- Do Not Delete Previous Posts: Nothing on the internet can be fully deleted, and trying to hide evidence of misconduct will only harm your credibility with the court. It is always better to be honest with the court, and with your attorney prior to a hearing, about any previous posts that are brought up.
- Monitor Tags: Keep up to date on what others may tag you in or post about you. Although you may not control the original content, posts from others may still be introduced as evidence.